Hey ladies! I’ve been sitting on this one for a minute. Hair. Is. A. Struggle. I wanna talk about it today.

Ever since I can remember, my momma instilled in me the importance of making sure my hair was “laid.” It was just as important as a man’s shoes….that’s something else that I will get to in another blog. I can remember going with my mother to Mrs. Evans’ house in Gentilly to get my hair “pressed.” Holding my ear and the occasional burn from that hot comb will forever be etched in my brain! I didn’t know it then, but I was natural. I remember begging my momma for a perm (relaxer…I learned that later) because all of my friends had one and they could go swimming. Peer pressure is something ain’t it? So, she finally gave in my junior year in high school and I had a relaxer for my ring ceremony. That was a big deal in 1996. From that moment on, I could wear the styles every body else had. It was then that my standing appointment at somebody’s hair salon began. I never missed a beat. My mother did not “do hair” and I still don’t.

Fast forward to the 2000’s. Hair is still a big deal for me. I’ve had some bad highlighting experiences that led me to a pixie cut, which I rocked the hell out of by the way. It was then, that I decided to give up on the “creamy crack” and start my natural hair journey. Let me tell you that this is truly a journey and I’m struggling.

I started with a sew in. It took a few different stylists before I got it right but I became a believer! A sew in helped to grow my pixie cut out. So let’s start here ladies. A sew in can make or break you! Quality is very important here. You will get what you pay for. Start with the hair. Plan to spend at least $250 on your hair. I can give you a few recommendations if you reach out to me. Next, when choosing a stylist, please make sure they are braiding properly…Save the EDGES! Also, a sew in does not mean that you forget about your hair underneath! I was still at the hair salon weekly for a wash. Remember, I’m a Bougie Woman so weekly is what I do…some may be ok with every 2 weeks. Whatever you decide, please wash it. Nobody wants to be that chick with the stank weave. Trust me.

After the sew in, I moved on to a wig. Ladies…..I LOVE WIGS. I learned that with sew in’s, having “leave out” leads to heat damage. My goal was to be a naturally curly girl so this was a major issue. Also, with a sew in, I was stuck with my hair for 6-8 weeks. Oh, that’s another thing. I prefer to only wear my sew in’s for 8 weeks at the most. My first wig was the curly wig. I love Consuela (most people name their wigs). The wig allowed me to work out and not have to worry about my hair. I know wigs and weaves aren’t for everybody. I’ve heard it. If your hair is laid everyday then it’s not for you, if it’s not be open to it. I’m just a messenger ladies.

On my recent trip to London, I purchased a lace front wig. I’m still on the fence about that one. It requires way more work than I thought.


FAST FORWARD to last week. So, I decided that I want to wear my real hair (that’s so funny to me). This is such a learning process for me. I visited a salon…my second natural hair salon in fact. Silly me for thinking that I could just walk out with curly hair like “Consuela.” I have heat damage. Major heat damage. WTF? I have had my hair flat ironed a few times and did roller wraps, but damn! Now I have to cut all of my hair off and start over? Y’all, this makes no sense to me. I wanna give up and just keep flat ironing my hair. Why is this so hard? I’ll be rocking a bun until I figure out this lace wig.

I have so many questions and I need answers. Where are my natural sistas? How do you do it? What are go to products? Should I do a big chop or give up?


Nola Bougie